Just Throw Something On
Ten weeks of not caring.
The school year ends this week. I am proud of Rivi for being a great student who is studying diligently for her exams. I just wish she were capable of maintaining any semblance of order while doing so. I ventured into her room this morning to pull out some summer clothes. (Although “pull out” implies some degree of organization — it was more of a dig through what appeared to be the remains of study snacking, a fleece from February, and an assortment of dirty clothing landmines.)
I made my way through the debris and excavated some shorts, a couple of t-shirts, and lots of used hair ties. Rivi’s summer clothes are simple and easy — in many ways, the same pieces she wore as a little girl.
Here’s what they make me remember: Rivi as a toddler, running around without a thought about what she was wearing (if anything). Then the phase where she wore whatever I put on her, in whatever combination I chose, without question or complaint. Then the slow emergence of preference — certain colors, certain textures, an unexplainable and deeply felt hatred for ballet flats. And then, not long after that, something else entered: awareness. Of what her friends were wearing. Of the gap between what she felt like on the inside and what the outside world might see.
That awareness is developmentally appropriate (as is the state of her room, most likely). I know this. Some version of it is necessary. But standing in the middle of her room holding a pair of green gingham-ish shorts, I notice I’m in no rush for it to be fully installed.
What these four outfits have in common is a complete absence of agenda. Shorts and a tee. A tank and denim. Overalls with something soft underneath. For teenagers (at least the ones who live in my house), getting dressed during the summer isn’t about communicating anything to anyone — it’s just the thing you do before you walk out the door.
In the fall, there will be opinions again. She’ll want to look a certain way on a certain day for reasons she may or may not share with me. That’s already part of her life, and I’m not complaining — it’s part of the identity work I’ve written about here several times. But for approximately ten weeks, she gets to just throw something on and go.
If she avoids stepping on any potentially destructive bedroom landmines, that is.
What’s the “just throw something on” piece in your kid’s (or your!) wardrobe this summer? Reply and let me know.
Love this little slice of life! And now I feel compelled to purchase the Boden tank 😊 I was looking for a solid white tank with that type of neckline!